Right or Reconciliation?
As I've written about recently, I had a bit of a blow-up with someone close to me. I've been hurt, angry, disgusted, and even angrier. I've tried to think of what my part in this blow up could have been. I realize and have finally accepted that I did play a part as I was joking around and this person didn't take it well, leading to their blow up.
Now that I accept that I did, in fact, play a role in all of this, I decided to apologize for the teasing. I should not have expected anything in return but I did. I expected them to reciprocate and apologize for blowing up, threatening, and belittling me--then we would have reconciliation. But instead, this person proceeded to defend their position and behavior. They took the position that they were in the right, and it was all my fault. Now there is no reconciliation, I'm still hurt, and I still think they are crazy, but now also very selfish.
So, here I am, blogging about "right or reconciliation". "What's most important to you?", my wife asked me last night, "being right or being reconciled?".
With those closest to us we will sometimes disagree; sometimes we may even argue, but shouldn't we always seek to reconcile our relationships? Or should we stand our ground and instead choose to be right, leaving the relationship to flounder or worse? Apologizing is hard. Admitting you're wrong is hard. But sometimes it's the right thing to do. Sometimes it's better to be reconciled than it is to be right.
Here's to being reconciled with those closest to us. I pray being right does not get in our way.
Best,
DK
Now that I accept that I did, in fact, play a role in all of this, I decided to apologize for the teasing. I should not have expected anything in return but I did. I expected them to reciprocate and apologize for blowing up, threatening, and belittling me--then we would have reconciliation. But instead, this person proceeded to defend their position and behavior. They took the position that they were in the right, and it was all my fault. Now there is no reconciliation, I'm still hurt, and I still think they are crazy, but now also very selfish.
So, here I am, blogging about "right or reconciliation". "What's most important to you?", my wife asked me last night, "being right or being reconciled?".
With those closest to us we will sometimes disagree; sometimes we may even argue, but shouldn't we always seek to reconcile our relationships? Or should we stand our ground and instead choose to be right, leaving the relationship to flounder or worse? Apologizing is hard. Admitting you're wrong is hard. But sometimes it's the right thing to do. Sometimes it's better to be reconciled than it is to be right.
Here's to being reconciled with those closest to us. I pray being right does not get in our way.
Best,
DK
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